I'm falling to pieces...

during asmi's bday..and mimie brought over his shisha..


fisheries science camp..8th August~

sungkai at imperial hotel..1st day of puasa~


lab tyme! hehe..the aroma of stinky fish was all over the place


trip to KB! went 2 mimie's sister's wedding~


some recent pictures of wats happening in my life..and i'm lovin every single momen!

also..the lyrics of my favourite song...can't get enough of it..njoy~~

Break Even-The Script

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,
Just prayed to a *** that I don't believe in,
'Coz I got time while she got freedom,
'Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break even.

Her best days will be some of my worst,
She finally met a man that's gonna put her first,
While I'm wide awake, she's no trouble sleeping,
'Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even no.

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok
I'm falling to pieces
I'm falling to pieces

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
'Coz she's moved on while I'm still grieving
And when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even no.

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces, (One still in love while the other one's leaving)
I'm falling to pieces, ('Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break even)

You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain,
You took your suitcase, I took the blame.
Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, oh.
'Coz you left me with no love, with no love to my name.

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,
Just prayed to a *** that I don't believe in,
'Coz I got time while she got freedom,
'Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break, no it don't break, no it don't break even no.

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces, (One still in love while the other one's leaving)
I'm falling to pieces, ('Coz when a heart breaks no it don't break even)

Oh, it don't break even, no
Oh, it don't break even, no
Oh, It don't break even, no

some recent pictures of wats happening in my life..and i'm lovin every single moment!

new student intake 2009/2010...weee~~

yep3..new students are enrolling in UMS....*excited*
i was involved with the 'Sesi Bersama Sekolah-SST'...it was a two-days event which was held on 1st and 3rd July...okayyy..so on the 1st of July,had 2 wake up really early bcuz we were required to be there at UMS by 7.30am and also bcuz i hav 2 send my lil bro Nadzmi 2 skul..heh...i arrived at Dewan canselor at 7am! owh boy was i early! aha~
so no choice but to wait inside the car 4 about 20 minutes till i got a message from Pei Wen..got out of the car and went straight to the dc foyer,then wait again till about 8am sumthin and all of us went into the main hall..and the worst part begins....we, the seniors, had to listen to all the taklimats till 12.30pm! its like we had to undergo the orientation all over again..sheesh..
well,it wasn't all that bad..i think..soooooo..after all the taklimats were done *finally*, Tor, Pei Wen and I get to meet our marine science juniors..yay! total of 39 new marine science juniors...then we all queued up and headed straight to our bus and off we went to IPMB! (IPMB=AA) *wink wink*
when we arrived, we went to bilik seminar 1 for a quick intro and briefing of the IPMB and its lecturers..we, the marine science students combined with aquaculture students and the whole bilik seminar 1 was full..huhu..
tick tock tick tock..and done with the briefing..tyme for the seniors to bring the juniors on a quick tour around IPMB..the aquaculture students went to the hatchery, while we went to the aquarium and the boat hse..*quick peek at AA* and we wrapped it up at 5pm and went back to our respective dwellings...
3rd July! the registration day for the juniors! okay..so i arrived at the UMS lbry at about 8am..it was soo crowded! huuu...glad i don't hav to register on that day..at the libry foyer, a lot of juniors asked us about the registration thing..we had to repeat the same explanation over and over and over again..aha~
then after that the seniors were told to go into the libry..we had to go through the whole crowd!! luckily the juniors let us through..thanx! so when we got into the libry, we had to do the same thing we did outside.."explaining" our throats we really2 dry by then...huh~
i forgot what tyme it was when we had our lunch...after that we went in again and this tyme into the megalab...we had to assist the juniors on how to login and do the members registration for the ums portal...
but there was one heck of a problem..server down! poor juniors..they had to refresh the website a LOT of tymes just to register...there was this girl..she waited there for about 3 hours! OMG..so kesian oo..and for us the seniors,we supervised the juniors, went round and round the cubicles to check on them...seriously my legs were killing me at that tyme..have to stand and walk around for hours...i repeat..HOURS...but it was worth the experience though..sadly,the technicians told us that the website need to be repaired..so the juniors had to go back and register at another tyme..hmmmm...so i left, and went to Sabah divers to collect my dive card..yay!! so thats it folks! a fun and exciting but really tiring day!
till next tyme...
~au revoir~

family vacation with the Maleks~

yep...this time its with the Maleks at DZ Nature Resort, Ulu Kimanis...okayy..1st impression of the resort when we arrived? its looks nice..but one problem..it was so hot there! no shades of trees..we were all sweating when we were checking-in at the lobby, can u believe that? fuh..but no matter..its just the temperature there..the facilities were quite okayy..thankfully there was air-conditioningin our room..switched it on full blast! woohooo~~
after settling in into our rooms..we went to the air terjun at around 1.30pm..all of us imagined it too be big and an open area..aha..the jokes' on us..it was a wee bit shmoll..and the water was a bit murky..urgh..but the others didn't care..they all just jumped in =.=
later dat nite we had a barbeque and a bit karaoke..eat, sing, laughed, bla bla bla..
and the next morning! jungle-trekking! a bit excited..hehe..mum sprayed a LOT of insect repellent on us..i mean a LOT! all over our legs..haha..its to prevent the leeches actually..and off we go! at 1st it was ok..a bit hilly..but due to me being a couch potato for weeks..i got tired easily..yay me..it wasn't very far and i was already exhausted..darn~
aha..then the worst part came..can u guess what it was?? *drums rolling*....'TANGGA'! OMG! we went up and up and up and up....it was really tiring as we went uphill..but as we were going downhill it was ok...OK MY ASS..the base of my shoes came off on the side..so i have to walk slowly as to stop it from coming off completely..as the result..i was one of the lasts to arrive..pfft.. XD
overall it was funnn..a vacation with a lot of family members is indeed the best! can't wait for the next family vacation! weee~~

u call it excuses..I call it reasons..

nope...not another depression mode post..just feel like posting sumthing..although i'm damn sleepy..yawn~~
yeah i know the recent blog was a bit..wat do u call it..'emo'? heh..its nothin to serious really..people do have those kind of 'moments' sumtimes..proves that i'm human. yay? okay..lets get to the point..hmm..i think it was because i was really2 upset and plus the hormones? it was that time of the month when us females sumtimes feel a bit overly sensitive and get depressed easily...damn those hormones! owh youth~~
yeah rite..excuses excuses..but wat the hell? felt a bit of relief after expressing myself..thanx a lot to my beloved and dear friends feefa and zue for cheerin me up! big hugs and sloppy kisses to both of u! luv u guys! muax2!
nevertheless..i'm also lookin forward for them to come back from egypt..feefa, zue, mimie and nema! miss u guys so so much! hurry up and come back will ya please?? gettin all excited here..aha
so now i'm on my holiday..still one more month to go..ahhh...sweet vacation~~
mangas and animes are my faithful companions during my months long holiday..shoujo mangas makes me feel all giddy and happy and all sorts of sweet feelings..and animes? onepiece to be exact..its super funny and awesome!! luffy and the way he speaks..seriously all he thinks about is niku and adventure and he really is dense did u notice that? haaaa..watchin animes warms the cockles of my heart..urgh..*xcuze me while i puke*
owh well..dats about it though..wat i've been doing these past weeks..seclude myself in my safe haven and spending my freetime with my laptop..fufufufu~~

u readers suggest a title 4 me...

stop saying don't show ur tantrum..when u say dat..how do u expect me to respond..i am already pissed off n annoyed and u expect me to put on a calm face, walk away and do as u say??? do u think i'm a robot or just a puppet?? u think i hav no emotions or feelings at all?? do u know how hard it is to fight back tears and just walk away? to take the step..to move a muscle when my mind is clouded by hatred and extreme annoyance..bcuz of u..now i would put on a poker face and act like i'm fine when i'm mad or sad in front of people..being fake is hard..made me feel like i'm lying to people..not showing wat i was feeling at dat moment..its hard 2 open up even to my closest and nicest friends..emotions..feelings build up..angry and sad especially..piling up..piling up...and now i'm a person with a lot of negative thoughts..i'm pessimistic..my heart is rotten...i hate this..i hate this..SHIT! tell me a good reason not to take that blade just right there beside me and slit my wrists rite now?? wats my reason to live?? family? they think i'm useless..i am useless..all i do is just sit around at home..lock myself up in the room in front of the laptop..next..friends? ouh..they're far away...my phone is always silent during the holidays...nex, boyfriend? none..the guy i like doesn't like me back..unrequited love..dats wat people are calling it..lets see..who else?? wat else?? now i just hate people lying to me..lies lies lies..u say u like me..yeah rite..u say dat to all the girls u set ur eyes ur eyes on..sumone said i'm ego..i'm not willing to accept sumone who so called syg me..huh..dats just BULLSHIT..stop saying dat to me..it's annoying..i hate it..stay away from me..i hate people making a fool out of me..i'm not an idiot..don't make me spit out bad words bcuz of u..i'm wasting my time and energy just thinking about it..stay away..i'm deleting u from my life..no matter how innocent u think u are..i'm not changing my mind..
i know i'm writing all these just bcuz i'm upset..yeah..i'm cooling down..i don't have anyone to share dis with..maybe i'll feel pathetic if i spill all of these to anyone..yeah..maybe..but i hav no other choice..i hav to write or type it all down..i hate doing this..but if don't do dis..i'm afraid i'm gonna snap..or worst..get insane..losing my mind is just one annoyance away if i don't let it out..if u're reading this..i know u people will start judging me..looking at me in a different way..but wat the hell..i'm doing this bcuz i want to..so shut up and just read..okayy dats a bit harsh..sory..

my exam schedule..ikut2 ms mui2..eheh..

iklan jap during chemical oceanography lab...wahahaha!!

-20th Apr-
Basic Chem! yah mmg basic..basic of physical chem, organic chem..suma masuk! adidi..

-22nd Apr-
Bahasa Mandarin..hmmm...ni susa part Hanzi (chinese characters)..mmg cramp tgn trus menulis..wakaka

-24th Apr-
Pengenalan Marikultur..hmm..this one ble thn la..not too easy..not 2 difficult..

-25th Apr-
Renang! ujian bertulis..siap ada essay lg..argh! camana mau jawab ni?

-29th Apr-
Hbgn etnik a.k.a. Sejarah..haha..spm all over again..cipta sejarah sndri..ngiahaha~

-5th May-
Asas Pelayaran & Kepelautan..the practical was a load of fun! hope can do well in this exam..AA! *wink2*

-6th May-
Pengenalan Oseanografi Kimia..huh..dis one..err...errr...got some topics dats a bit difficult..watever~

-7th May-
Bhs & Komunikasi..both lecturer & lecture's are bery2 interesting & fun! weee~

-8th May-
Pengaturcaraan Komputer & Simulasi..*scratches head* most difficult off all the sbjtcs I'm taking this sem! huwaaa...

wokey..3 weeks of exam to go and then i'll be freeeee..free as a bird! yippie! 2months++ of holiday!! ngee..so wish me luck! =P
~au revoir~

What does my birthday say about me?

Here's what it says:

• Has a lot of ideas. *more to crazy ideas*
  
• Difficult to fathom.*yeah..sumtymes*
• Thinks forward. *to cheer myself up*
  
• Unique and brilliant
• Extraordinary ideas.*again..more 2 crazy ideas*
  
• Sharp thinking.
• Fine and strong clairvoyance.
• Can become good doctors. *yeah right*
  
• Dynamic in personality.
• Secretive. *yep!*
  
• Inquisitive.
• Knows how to dig secrets.*muahaha..beware~~*
  
• Always thinking.
• Less talkative butamiable. *yep!*
  
• Brave and generous.
• Patient.
• Stubborn and hard-hearted.*agree 100%*
  
• If there is a will, there is a way.
• Determined.
• Never give up.
• Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. *dis is right so jan cari psl*
  
• Loves to be alone.*sumtymes*
• Thinks differently from others.
• Sharp-minded.
• Motivates oneself.
• Does not appreciate praises. *uih..ira mnta pujik meh* =P
  
• High-spirited.
• Well-built and tough. *xcuze moi?*
  
• Deep love and emotions.
• Romantic. *haha!*
  
• Uncertain inrelationships.*yesss*
• Homely.
• Hardworking.
• High abilities.
• Trustworthy.
• Honest and keeps secrets. *ur secrets r safe with me*
  
• Not able to control emotions.*yeah*
• Unpredictable

well..now u know a lil bit more bout me!!
aiseh..hehehe..
will continue more about the camp laterrrr~~
=)

~au revoir~